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Sometimes they blame someone else when they feel guilty or ashamed.
This accounts for high reactivity and conflict in codependent relationships.
Even parents who profess their love may alternately behave in ways that communicate you’re not loved as the unique individual who you are.
Shame is often unconscious, but may drive a person to love others who can’t love or don’t love them.
It’s a psychological axiom that each loss recapitulates prior losses.
You may have had other losses as an adult that compound grief about the current one.
Codependents find it hard to let go because they haven’t let go of the childhood hope of having that perfect love from their parents.
Shame can lead to In the dysfunctional and insecure family environment in which codependents grow up, they develop strategies and defenses in order to feel safe and loved.